One of the most joyful and life changing experiences you could ever have is welcoming a newborn into your family. As a first time parent, you’ll feel excited, apprehensive, and worried about what’s going to change because honestly, most people picture a cute baby. They don’t picture themselves with the baby and that’s a problem!
You’re not just going to have a baby in the house, you’re going to be responsible for everything from caring for it, changing it, feeding it and making sure that it’s safe and warm.
You as an individual are also going to change once you have a baby. And it’s not just a physical change, it’s a visceral change. To help you to navigate this new place in your life, we’ve got a checklist for success that should help you along your way.
- Set up Your bedroom. Most places will tell you to set up the nursery, but the nursery isn’t going to be used for the first six months of your child’s life. Yes, it’s nice to have the crib set up and ready in there. Or you could set your nursery up as a space for you to feed quietly at night time. Creating a safe, comfortable and functional nursery is a priority, but the actual baby is going to be in your bedroom for the first six months of life because research shows that’s the best thing you could do. It should be free of hazards, and a bedside crib is probably the best way to go.
- Start reading. It’s so important that you start reading on how you can care for a newborn. Most people who have never held a baby before will hold one for the very first time once they’ve had their own child. You need to learn how to care for your newborn’s hair, how to top and tail bathe them, and you need to be able to learn how to change a nappy. There is a lot to learn when it comes to looking after a baby and a lot of it will come from instinct, but a lot of it can set you up for success if you read what you can.
- Start stocking up on the essentials. There are things that you need to stock up on before your baby arrives. Newborns, until they’re at least a year old, need to be comfortable. So don’t worry about buying baby outfits or two pieces because not only are they going to get puked on a lot, they’re not particularly comfortable for a baby to have a pair of elasticated trousers. Baby clothes like sleep suits, onesies and socks in soft materials will be just fine. You’ll need a variety of diaper sizes and wipes. Newborns grow very fast. You also need to stock up on the cotton wool because cotton wool and water is usually the best thing that you should use on a baby’s bottom to prevent any chemicals touching their skin. Make sure that you have some muslin clothes on hand though, because a wet bottom is going to be prone to rashes.
- Choose a pediatrician. While you’re choosing your team for your birth, you need to think about choosing a pediatrician for your baby. Research and visit potential pediatricians to find somebody that you feel comfortable with and make sure that they are close to your home for convenience. You want to look out for a board certification and experience with newborns and you want a pediatrician who’s pro vaccine because these vaccines were created as preventative medicine. You want your baby to be protected by all and any diseases, and by refusing vaccinations you are refusing to protect your child.
- Learn what you can about feeding. You’re going to have a lot of information thrown at you about feeding your child between breastfeeding or formula feeding. You need to make sure that you gather the right supplies for any of those methods.If you’re breastfeeding, you’re going to need nursing bras, fair breast pumps and storage bags, and you may even need to get some accessible clothing or cover ups. Of course you don’t have to cover yourself when you’re feeding your child, but if you feel more comfortable that way then that’s up to you. If you choose the formula feed, you need to research brands of formula, find the right bottles and sterilising equipment for either feeding session. You need burp clothes to help you to stay dry.
- Prepare for the lack of sleep. You’re going to see a lot of information about sleep training, but you do not need to sleep train a baby. Firstly, newborn babies are designed to wake up every couple of hours. They have stomachs the size of walnuts, which means that they’re going to feed little and often, and whether you breast or bottle feed, they can and will cluster feed so that they can learn to eat. This means you’re going to be woken up quite a lot during the night. You need to follow the safe sleep guidelines so that you can avoid Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, which is not to scare you, but it’s very much a real thing. You also need to establish a gentle bedtime routine with calming activities, soft lighting and music to help the baby differentiate between night and day. Just be aware that this routine is a loose one, because routine doesn’t really mean anything to a newborn.
- Gather your village. As a first time parent, it’s important that you have a supportive village, not an overbearing one. If you have a mother or a mother-in-law in the family who’s going to try and take over and tell you what to do, that’s not the village you should be looking for. Enlisting help for errands and meals and cleaning is what you’re looking for. Speak to your friends and your family and let them know your boundaries when it comes to visiting the baby for the first time and what you would like from them in terms of their help. There will be some of your friends and family who will not offer you their help, and that’s OK too, but it will help you to determine who you can and cannot rely on.